Top 10 things a New Mother Must know
# 1. Don’t let the baby eat dirt
(If the baby poops green…don’t worry)
#2 Don’t let the baby eat grass
#3 If the baby screams when you take away the bottle, chances are you didn’t put enough rum in it
#4 Should a rash develop, have yourself checked out immediately
#5 Mother in laws who think you are incompetent give helpful advice can become clumsy around this oughta take care of the old bat accidental kitchen spills
#6 Teething is normal. Stay away from baby if urge continues
#7 Don’t try to pawn the gas smell on the baby. We all know it was you
#8 Mothers and fathers do things differently and that’s o.k. The baby will grow up to know the truth love you both and realize that you are always there for them I do way more
#9 Sucking snot out of baby’s noise is to be expected. Using a straw is not.
#10 If screaming and crying persist, go into another room or you will wake the baby
Posts
9 comments:
This is hilarious! I love #3. So THAT'S why that kid wouldn't shut the hell up! lol Awesome blog!
This make me laugh so hard, you are very funny. I love your two-step rule, I think we should do more of that.
Great blog
Following you from MBC
LOVE YOuR BLOG!!! Im following now....
This is genius! So funny! Wish I knew these tips about two years ago!
So funny. Following now! Great post. Saw you on MBC.
http://telecommutingmommies.blogspot.com
Alaina
I LOVE THIS!!! These are great :)
So glad I found you on MBC!!
I'm at http://pediatricsafety.net
love your post! ths is my first read...will read more next time ;)
hope we can exch. links...
life round me N you
earthy me
at-a-blink
heartQUAKES
I love that! It is too funny. Thanks for sharing something fun. Following from MBC http://www.guessingalltheway.com
Must stop reading your blog. I'm laughing so hard my face hurts!!! I'm following you now and also grabbing your button.
Oh, and I found you via SITS.
Post a Comment