Wednesday, December 29, 2010

No Post Radio!














I feel a severe bout of strange coming on.


Something unthinkable happened this holiday season.


I might even be talking to you from another dimension right now…I’m still not sure.


Not sure because if there is one thing I can depend on every holiday season, year in and year out…come hell or ...OK, just hell... it’s


Family Drama at Christmas.


Scream filled hallways splattered with insults and slights.


Legendary rifts dividing loved ones to separate corners forever....




So imagine my surprise when, with 2005 and 2008 grudge notes firmly in hand,





…it never came.




Maybe they were waiting until after dinner this time to begin the fallout festivities.


But even after the appropriate compliments on the food and dibs on leftovers were all said and done….



Still nothing.



Perhaps after suffering through each person’s sorry-ass, eight count piano rendition of Heart and Soul…



Nope.



Were they waiting for me to start?



‘cause I can do this.



Ooooh wait…



“Soooo how’s work going?” my sister in law asks as she slides herself onto the seat across from me.



Finally, here it comes.



I see my husband throw me a conspiring go-get-‘em wink.



I shoot him back my best Lock and Load heads up.




Ready.




“Not bad, putting in a lot of hours, you know, trying to make it work”



“That’s great. I envy you trying something different at this stage of your life. I wish I had the guts to try something else”



…OH YEAH? WELL WHAT ABOUT THE TIME WHEN YOU SAID….huh?....wha?...



um...thanks”



?


OK, hold on here comes my other sister in law…a.k.a. Thing Two…. Now this is gonna be good.


“Hey I loved that cake you brought. It was delicious and wow your hair grew back so fast. It looks great!”



What the…..?




ALRIGHT, WHO’S DYING?




“er...thanks ….”



“Could you tell me who cuts your hair? I really need a new stylist”






“…GRRRRRRR.....I’ll email you the number…”




Am I dying?




What the HELL is happening here???!!



And it went on like this ALL night!



Everyone playing……….



NICE!



No bloodbath over Monopoly, no bruised feelings over past brawls that were securely embedded last time I checked.



What’s this world coming to when you can’t even depend on the annual Christmas fight that fuels us with the anger in which we’ve become accustomed to the entire year long?



Respective in-laws retreating into their cars to discuss the “can you believe’s” and “how could theys”.



The annual added layer of bitterness that helps build and sustain the completely, unhealthy drama that is so distinctively our family?



Don’t tell me I’ll have to find something else to talk to my husband about now.




All's I know is that 2010 ended with confusion and a well-prepared list of unspoken insults burning a hole in my stomach.



But, as the New Year rolled in..... it all became perfectly clear.






They're plotting to kill me.







Finally some action!



How was your family drama? (-:



This is the coolest ever! Thank you Lauren for this Psycho Carnival Award!!

This is the coolest ever! Thank you Lauren for this Psycho Carnival Award!!
Now visit Lauren and witness all of her originality greatness!

Thank you my Jersey Girl Goddess!! Now go meet her @inannasstar.blogspot-No way you can resist!!!

Thank you my geeky friend!!! Now go check out Confessions of a Reforming Geek..she is way cool!

Thanks to Diane over at Just Humor Me-Rules for this award: Drink & Blog-Do you see why I love her?

Thanks to Diane over at Just Humor Me-Rules for this award: Drink & Blog-Do you see why I love her?
If you have not met Diane, please check her out. You will not be sorry! You trust me right? Go!

Thank you to the Empress at Gooddayregularpeople- Go visit this magnificent blogger!!!

Thank you Linda! How cool is this award from my buddy over @thegoodthebadtheworse? I know right?

Thank you Linda! How cool is this award from my buddy over @thegoodthebadtheworse? I know right?
She's totally awesome!! Go check her out and see!!!

I Won!!! The Golden Phallus #32 Is Mine!!! Many thanks to The Screaming Me-Me!!!!

I Won!!! The Golden Phallus #32 Is Mine!!! Many thanks  to The Screaming Me-Me!!!!
Go check out the Screaming Me-Me for THE most captioning fun on the internet!!!! She's one of the friendliest Blog hosts out there!!!! Have fun & Caption away!!!!

Huge thanks to Nancy at ifevolutionworks.com for this award-Love this !!!

Thanks Heather @ twolittlemonkeysplushubby & Richele @underthegoldenappletree

Thanks so much to Margaret over at lollipopsandpickles.blogspot.com & Katsconfessions.blogspot.

Thanks so much to Margaret over at lollipopsandpickles.blogspot.com & Katsconfessions.blogspot.
Thanks to Tami xoxo@heartsmakefamilies.com & Richeleoxo@underthegoldenappletree.blogspot! Also to Hil'Lesha @ tothemotherhood.com-& Vicki @ frugalmomknowsbest.com & Amanda at bloggertowne.blogspot You guys rock!!!

DOUBLE THANKS to Noelle @elasticwaistbandsandcomfortableshoes & Daffy@ batcrapcrazy-U GUYS RULE

DOUBLE THANKS to Noelle @elasticwaistbandsandcomfortableshoes & Daffy@ batcrapcrazy-U GUYS RULE
Another Awesome heartfelt thanks to the awesome Lauren @Thinkspin & multi-creative Robin @insightsandbellylaughs.com-find them ...follow them...go!!!

The Rosie Award Comes Home!!!

The Rosie Award Comes Home!!!
Thanks to my bloggy buddy @thewannabewahm.com for bestowing this award back to me and letting me keep a Rosie at home forever!!!!

Sunshine Makes My Day!! Many Thanks to Joy@ thepracticalmomguide & Ziva @Zivasinferno for the shine

 

Thank you Anat over at bsparkly.blogspot.com for this spectacular award!!!

HUGE thanks to Gabrielle @ thewifeyblogs.blogspot.com and Lisa @snugglebugglerockmom.blogspot.com!!

Thanks Lee!!!

Thanks Jenie for The Lady Ms Blogger Award! Visit her giving greatness @heniperrr.blogspot.com/

Double Thanks to Robyn for both of these awards-visit her @ http://robyns-page.blogspot.com/

Double Thanks to Robyn for both of these awards-visit her @ http://robyns-page.blogspot.com/
Tamara-Thank you for this!!! xoxoxoxoox visit her at @ homespunheartscandles.blogspot.com xoxoxo

Thanks so much to Blia @ superheroesmom.com

Grab An Award-see below

Finally, you do not need to be a recipient of an award to give an award!

Grab An Award – My way of awarding it forward. The only rules are: THERE ARE NO RULES (Only rule is no rules? Rule for rules? Is that a rule? I’m so confused)

And what is nicer than giving an award with no strings attached just because?

So in the spirit of fun blog awarding and ‘cause I think they’re a great way to connect and share the blog love with our awesome fellow bloggers (without the chain letter affect-they give me the willies), I have created The Divine Blogger and Rock Star Blogger Awards to grab-I know, fancy right? -(o.k. so I won't quit my day job)

Grab it and let the lucky recipient (s) know that you have given them a rule-free award and not to be afraid to pick it up on your site. Once they grab it from your site, they are free to pass it along to others (rule-free of course). And anyone can grab it from their sites to pass on as well.

Hope you all enjoy awarding it forward!

Now hurry! Go make room in your closet for all that good karma. And please get rid of those old sweatpants while you're at it! (-:


The No Rules Rock Star Blogger Award

The No Rules Divine Blogger Award

Award Love Received

Thanks so much to Lisa at Grandmasbriefs.com (the Grandma sites got it going on yo) and Robyn at Simply Delightful and Tamara at homespunheartscandlesand Jane @agingmommyblog for this award. You guys are awesome!

Okay, here are my 10 honest things about myself:

1. I am an extremely well balanced individual

2. I am easily distracted

3. I don’t take rules seriously

4. I lied about number one (number 3 made me do it)

5. I have a short attention span

6. I often don’t finish what I sta..


Finger Linkin' Blogs

A Must Read Award

A Must Read Award

Who's with me?

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