I believe that it is time for bowels to step aside and let The Douche Movement take over.
Nothing against a good bowel movement but sometimes a girl needs some extra cleansing.
Yeah, I’ve been drinking. Since when does anyone like a sober blogger?
So in this movement the blogger cleanses all feelings of angst and woe. Curses all enemies and fears. Name calls all those worthy. Bloggy slams all husbands. And then let’s the cleansing satisfaction seep out as any good douche would do.
In other words....your typical blog...Summer's Eve style.
Here is my weekly contribution to The Douche Movement:
“Oh honey" I purr sleepily "I’m so tired after eating all that turkey. How about you?”
“Tired from turkey? Now what cracker made that crap up?” He snorts.
“It’s true, there is an ingredient in the turkey called tryptophan and it makes you tired”
“So it couldn’t be that you stuffed your face so damn much and blabbed at the same time that your jaw is now suffering from acute exhaustion? It has to be blamed on a mystery turkey ingredient?”
GRRRRRR “Well yeah”….Anyway, what want are we doing tonight?”
Husband looks at his paycheck "Well let me check" dramatic pause …. "yup..Nothing”
OOOOOOLLLLLrightythen......“Well, probably a good thing….I heard on the news that there is a rapist out on the loose. We all have to be careful”
Mr. Perpetual Eye Roll says “Like there’s not always a rapist running around out there. Just because you hear about one on the news, doesn’t mean that there aren’t millions already running around out there. Does the weather man have to come on TV and tell everyone he has a dick or shouldn’t you just know certain things?”
Now could it be his inner machinations of working curiosity that manifests an unknown resentment of an even deeper manifestation of pondering, which secretly harbors ill will towards the stupid and lame brained?
Or is he just an ass?
There. Weekly Douche Movement completed. I encourage all bloggers to create their own weekly and unique douche movement in an effort to cleanse and revive the …..Palette.
Before you get all backed up and explode. Then you would have to join The Enema Movement and that is for the boy bloggers. What? They need to douche too!
Screw milk...Douching does a body good!
Now sing it with me....Summer's Eve makes me feel fine....
You know? I think I’ll drink more often.
Proud member of The Douche Movement how about you?