Friday, January 15, 2010

No Talking on Mars

Part of the whole marriage fifty/fifty-give-and-take thing is listening to his bring-home-work-crap as much as he has to listen to mine.

Listening to my husband’s latest work story…I think that I do my part very well...

“So he told him ‘I’m a man of my words and I will do what I say I’m going to do’ and then you’ll never believe what…”

“It's word


“It’s a man of my word not man of my words

“Okay, anyway, so he gets up and says ‘anyone who listens to these old wise tales is bound to get caught up in…

Wives’ tales”


“It’s old wives tales not wise tales. Not surprising he hasn’t gone far in that company talking like that. You know the way you speak is just as important as how you dress. It’s all how you present yourself. Studies have shown that if you’d just take the time to….”

word/wise who cares! Would you please just focus on what I’m saying?

“I am focused”

It’s wives’

“So anyway, when everyone heard that he was…”

“Does his wife know that he talks like that?”

“Would you stop doing that? Pay attention to what I’m saying!”

“Sure, sure, sorry”

Should I call and tell her?

“She is married to him. I would imagine she has heard him speak. Who knows, she probably even listens when he does”

“Well I should hope so for his sake. You know the other day I saw her at the store and she looked a little…hey! Where are you going? You haven’t finished your story!”

Yeah, I know, men are really not big talkers.


Liz Mays on January 15, 2010 at 5:13 AM said...

My husband despises when I interrupt him. I've missed out on so many good stories because of myself!

MIG on January 15, 2010 at 5:17 AM said...

Funny! I wish my husband would walk away. My husband is such a big talker. So much a talker that I pretend to listen at times. He's starting to catch on to me though.

Moooooog35 on January 15, 2010 at 5:20 AM said...

I just read your husband's parts of this post.

Why..did you say something?

Ducky on January 15, 2010 at 5:28 AM said...

Teeeheee....could've taken place in my house :O)

I finally stopped correcting him. I just fume instead. It's not like he ever made the changes anyway...probably just to piss me off...OR when I would say "it's pronounced this way" he would insist he was saying it correctly.

Robin on January 15, 2010 at 5:36 AM said...

sometimes its so hard to bite your lip when they're just have to grin and bear it..or should "he" say grin and ban it..LOL

ReformingGeek on January 15, 2010 at 6:13 AM said...


I'm usually the one being interrupted for corrections. YIKES!

MrsBlogAlot on January 15, 2010 at 6:22 AM said...

And the winner of the good wife listener award goes to....obviously not me(-:

Unknown on January 15, 2010 at 6:42 AM said...

hahahahha! i love it...

Scarlet of Moms Wear Your Tees on January 15, 2010 at 6:51 AM said...

THis was hysterical!! So funny! My husband hates it when I interupt him too! He will just with hold the rest of the story!

BugginWord on January 15, 2010 at 7:40 AM said...

Sadly, I talk like your husband's coworker. It would be even worse if spell check was involved.

Maureen@IslandRoar on January 15, 2010 at 8:01 AM said...

So hard to silence the inner editor, huh?
I definitely did that with my ex.
He never did that, but then, he also didn't hear one word I ever said...

Jayne Martin on January 15, 2010 at 8:07 AM said...

LOL! Ah, yes... That whole sharing and compromise thing. Yet another reason why I'm single.

Jules AF on January 15, 2010 at 8:12 AM said...

I have to stop myself from correcting people's speech every time I talk to someone. I have to try SO HARD. haha

Anonymous said...

As a writer and (former) editor, my husband panics at the thought of sending me e-mails because he knows exactly what I'm doing as I'm reading them: editing, not focusing on what he's saying!

Of course, he SAYS a lot of things incorrectly, too, and I manage ... sometimes ... to keep my mouth shut. (Although I often share a giggle with my daughter afterwards if she was in the room and heard the same idiocy. She's following in her mom's shoes, that's for sure!)

Jen on January 15, 2010 at 11:46 AM said...

I used to correct my husband when he talked. I picked apart his grammar whenever we got into a fight and I was losing. We're divorced now.

Coffeypot on January 15, 2010 at 11:52 AM said...

Until I saw it written I always wondered why a wife's ass had anything to do with anything. I'm a man of my word, too. The wife or boss says do something and I say, "Okay!"

Claudya Martinez on January 15, 2010 at 7:06 PM said...

Well there are old wise tales out there.

Brilliant Sulk on January 15, 2010 at 8:32 PM said...

In my house it is quite the opposite. My husband corrects me every chance he gets.


Jen on January 16, 2010 at 6:06 AM said...

Hey Jen,
Just added your button to my blog - you're awesome!
My husband also corrects me more than he should. Sometimes I think men should just talk even less than they already do. They get themselves into such trouble...check out this previous post I did on the stupid stuff Dan said to me when I was pregnant...

Jen :)

Amo on January 16, 2010 at 11:34 AM said...

I have a lot of trouble sitting through my husband's work stories. He drags them out and then repeats himself several times before the torture is over. I really try, but eventually my attention span ends and I start to think about last night's episode of Ugly Betty or what I want to eat for dinner.

People Who Know Me Would Say: on January 16, 2010 at 2:09 PM said...

MWA HA HA HA HA! HBO baby.....weekly series. Every post is an episode!

People Who Know Me Would Say: on January 16, 2010 at 2:31 PM said...

Your name is Jen?

Anonymous said...

Funny you do this to your husband. -Mine- does it to me. :(

The Absence of Alternatives on January 16, 2010 at 5:20 PM said...

I need you to be by my side when I talk. I am Mrs. Malaprop. I make up proverbs as I go along. When I used the phrase "reach around" innocently in my conversation, my co-worker finally decided to step in for my own sake.

Corrie Howe on January 16, 2010 at 7:17 PM said...

Men. Can't live with them. Can't shoot them" as my college roommate used to say.

Diane Laney Fitzpatrick on January 17, 2010 at 5:18 AM said...

I edit my husband's conversations too. It really pisses him off. He's happy to have me edit things he's written, though.

The Single Mothers Chronicles on January 17, 2010 at 9:33 AM said...

I do the same thing...but in my opinion, that's how you can be sure I'm listening!!! If I wasn't paying attention, I'd just be grunting. They should thank us.

Andi on January 17, 2010 at 2:39 PM said...

Hilarious! I get to correct my hubby, but that is only because English is not his first language, he sometimes comes up with some hilarious things that totally crack me up!

Unknown on January 17, 2010 at 4:43 PM said...

Sounds like a focus conversation with my husband, except that he doesn't like to talk about work. He doesn't talk much in general. I wonder if he's still here. Very funny post. Thanks for stopping by Think Spin yesterday and commenting. I appreciate the follow. I am now a follower of your verbal adventures.

Name: Holly Bowne on January 17, 2010 at 6:23 PM said...

Ha,ha,ha! I totally do that to my hubs all the time--and I really don't mean to. After a bit, he'll cross his arms over his chest, arch his brow and say, "Uh...Can I FINISH?"

Anonymous said...

And where would a husband be without the input of his lovely wife...just doin' your job! Love it! Found you through Noelle.

Unknown on January 18, 2010 at 9:11 AM said...

LOL, I do the same thing to my Hubs. He gets furious with me when I correct him on grammar, etc., but I can't help myself.

Me-Me King on January 18, 2010 at 9:27 AM said...

Hmmmm, maybe this is why I am still single.

Captain Dumbass on January 18, 2010 at 10:04 AM said...

That sounds familiar.

Kimberly on January 18, 2010 at 4:01 PM said...

My husband says "You are interrupting me." Now, I have been raising my hand when I want to say something while we are having a conversation. (I think he finds that more irritating.)

Katherine on January 19, 2010 at 5:35 AM said...

Funny! My mother tends to correct our sayings and grammar - she used to be an English teacher. The thing that ALWAYS gets me is "am I going to LIE down or LAY down." I never get it right and she always lets me know. Sigh. I'm going to go lay/lie down.

Anonymous said...

I can never stop from correcting people when they mispronounce words or misquote. I'm a pain in the ass about that, that and a lot of other things too!


Just A Normal Mom on January 19, 2010 at 7:15 AM said...

I'm so bad at interrupting for corrections - I interrupt both him and me!

Eve on January 20, 2010 at 3:23 AM said...


Oh, let the man speak! ;)

I'd love my Husband to tell me work stories. His usually consist of "Work was ok. Someone pissed me off" Me: "What did you do?" His reply "you know...stuff".

I never get cool stories and I'm sure there must be loads if I know my husband at all....

Also I am always correcting people. especially when words are used incorrectly. argh!

Tracie on January 20, 2010 at 11:31 AM said...

My husband doesn't talk. If there is any talking going on it's me doing a monologue. Fun stuff.

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