Dr. Golb shakes his head in a haven't-we-been-through-this-already? manner and exhales flatly "Now, you know perfectly well that there is no cure for Blog withdrawal..."
"But I need..."
Golb interupts and holds up both hands in defiance and starts to explain "You'll just have to try.."
Shut up man!
Time is running out!
"You don't understand..." I plead in my best desperate give-me-a-hit blog junkie voice "I'm starting this new job and I don't have any time to blog. Give me something!" I screeched the last part grabbing his collar.
Ah, so this is what blog fear looks like.
Interesting.
I immediately give the illusion of coming to my senses and patted down the wrinkles I'd caused. Giving him the flirty eye and using my best Dynasty voice I say "Now come on Doc, I just need a little something. You know, just to, um...just hold me over."
He ignores me.
Screw Dynasty.
"My blog people are addictive!" I scream
Still nothing.
I see the get-off-the-blog-pipe-already-won't ya look down the nose of his bi-focals.
"Have you been taking your regular medication?" He asks.
"Oh, the one for in-law circus drama? Yeah, nothing helps. Can I have something stronger for that too?"
The doctor frowned at me.
I don't like frowns.
This doctor is an asscake.
"Why don't you just try blogging in small intervals, you know in moderation. You do remember what moderation is don't you?"
What did I tell you?
ASSCAKE.
The fact that this conversation is happening all in my head is no excuse.
I know, you'd think I could come up with a better doctor in my head right?
Maybe my imagination needs something stronger also.
Oh well, because there is no blog doctor (that I know of) to help me through this transition, I must rely strictly on vodka....and blog moderation.
Dammit.
Unless there is a blog doctor in the house.
Are you guys holding out on me with those drugs?
Come on! I'll even take generic!
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